Written by: Shenise Gatson
Have you ever felt like there are not enough hours in a day? Do you cringe at the thought of adding one more task to your to-do list? Do you feel like you are stumbling around trying to regain your balance?
Believe me, you are not alone. Myself and many other women have felt the same way. Sometimes we wear so many hats and play so many roles that we feel burned out. We pour so much into others’ lives but forget to replenish ourselves. At times, we may feel like we have reached our limit. Whenever you feel yourself nearing that breaking point, it is important to remember three things.
Identify your struggle.
For every woman, the struggle and story may be different. For some, the struggle may be managing a cranky toddler. For others, it may be conflict with a spouse. For another person it may be feeling “at wit’s end” because of their children’s lack of help with household chores. Yet, someone else may be feeling like work has taken over their life and personal time. Be patient with yourself. Realize that your feelings are legitimate. Once you have identified the struggle, next work on how to combat it.
Ask yourself, “What have I done for myself lately?”
One of the first ways to tackle that feeling is to find a way to relax, re-energize and rebuild. We live in a society that bombards us with constant reminders about self-care. Yet, when life gets busy and struggles consume us, sometimes we put our own needs aside to handle those matters. I have been guilty of telling myself, “I have to handle this first. I will get around to myself later.” Whenever this happens, I encourage you to think differently. You can still give attention those areas of your life. However, we must remember to make ourselves a priority as well. As much as we help and serve others, we have to pour back into ourselves too.
Find your avenue.
Make a personal commitment to do something for yourself. Once you choose a relaxing/rebuilding activity, then choose how often you want to insert it into your life. Some women decide that they will meet up with some girlfriends for a spa date and happy hour once a month. If you need to increase that for your own mental health, by all means do so! Whatever avenue you choose is fine. Make it unique to your experience and personal situation. When you look at your daily calendar or to-do list, pencil yourself in. In the midst of the struggle, you can enjoy little moments of solitude, peace and pleasure. Here are some suggestions below:
- Schedule a massage
- Enjoy a manicure or pedicure
- Ask a friend if they will babysit
- Coordinate a ladies night
- Plan an annual vacation
- Schedule a mini-vacation
- Shop for a new outfit
- Binge watch a TV show
- Skype/Face-time with a friend
- Go on a wine tour with relatives
- Read an engaging book/magazine
- Watch a movie with a nice glass of wine
- Exercise or power walk to upbeat music
- Take a night off from cooking and order takeout
- Enjoy a cup of coffee and peruse the local bookstore
Whenever you are tempted to dedicate time to everything else but yourself, remember….we cannot take care of others if we are not taking care of ourselves too. It is okay to have time for yourself. It is okay to step back. It is okay to say “no”. Remember, you are not alone. You are important too. Most of all, you deserve it!
Copyright @ 2018 Shenise Gatson
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